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The 3 Things: A Practical Path to Collective Recovery

By Maggie Boxey

Through Maggie’s drunken youth, she was reminded by her preacher father of The 3 Things: you are part of a family, be true to yourself, and glorify God in all that you do. But as Maggie shares in this transformational book, those old truths take on new meaning in modern life, recovery, and motherhood.

Sometimes, simplicity can untangle the most complicated messes. Even in the darkest pit with the cold hard slab of rock bottom pressed against our face, there is a lifeline of truth, a rope of wisdom we can grab to pull ourselves out. As Maggie Boxey curled into a tight ball of overwhelming shame, addiction, and isolation, she could hear her preacher father’s voice, echoing in her ears. “You are part of a family. Be true to yourself. Glorify God in all that you do.”

These were the three things Maggie’s Daddy would insist she repeat as a teenager before running out the door for “sleepovers” that were really trips to the darkest corners of town to binge drink with strangers. Each night, she would rattle off the 3 things before wandering off to pull herself further into the complicated mess it would take decades to untangle. It took her 25 hard, traumatic years for her to fully grasp the depth of her father’s words, through her time serving in the Navy, through addiction, and through losing custody of her child due to her behavior and instability.

The deeper Maggie sunk into addiction and isolation, the less she felt part of a family. Without community to see herself reflected back to her, it felt impossible for her to be true to herself. Instead of glorifying God in all she did, she resorted to foxhole prayers and felt unworthy of God’s love. She lived in the undoing of the 3 things until she found herself in an alcoholic suicidal bottom with only two ways to go: end it all, or surrender to a new beginning. She chose the latter.

With the 3 things as her guide, Maggie gathered powerful forces to aid her in her recovery: contemplation, community, celebration, and compassion for herself and others. She relied on her 12-step recovery community to help her get sober and put in the humble work to right the wrongs of her past. She became part of a family again, both chosen and inherited. Her compassionate honesty allowed her to be true to herself. And she remembered what it means to glorify God in all she did, whether that was taking out the trash, giving birth to her second child, or writing a book in service to others, The 3 Things.

In The 3 Things, Maggie Boxey shares how she used her faith to regain all she lost and find the will to start again, even when it seemed hopeless. She shares her struggles of being a sober progressive liberal and *gasp* vegetarian living in military communities in the South. And as a die-hard Indigo Girls fan, she guides readers from all walks of life and religious backgrounds to get closer to fine.

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